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Turning your Dreams into
Reality
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April, 2004
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Archived
Newsletters
"What holds you back? A little fear. What
holds you back? Voices ringing in your ear. What
holds you back? Trepidations, worn beliefs Have
got you by the collar Pulled you to your knees."
Ah, a wonderful song, one of my favourites, by
Mark Stanton Welch, "If the Truth be Told".
Fear- I know it holds me back at times, and I
see it holding other people back as well. And
most of it is imagined.
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Apparently we are born with only 2 fears- the
fear of falling and fear of loud noises. All the
other fears we gather and create throughout our
life. The fear of failing, fear of being successful,
fear of rejection, fear of change, fear of? What
are your fears, what holds you back?
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I
chose to write about fears because fear is staring
me in the face this month. I have chosen to develop
faith this year, and have stepped through my fears
in many ways, starting new endeavours and doing
things I've always wanted to but have been afraid
to start. I affirm each morning "I am a fulfilled
woman of faith who sings her truth", and
then go about doing something in faith. I see
faith as the opposite of fear- by trusting that
things will unfold as they should, and that whatever
happens will be for my highest good, I am pushing
through my fears. My confidence and abilities
have increased immensely, with each little leap
of faith I take. It truly is incredible!
So, here I am, with a bunch of new projects on
the go, procrastinating about the most urgent
one, because I'm afraid I will flop. What do I
do? I read a ton of articles on the subject, rather
than trusting and coming from what I know, hoping
in my quest for the new nugget of info my fear
will vanish. Do I know about the subject matter,
which is fear and boundaries? You betcha! Yet,
I look for more information, as if that is the
answer to eliminating my fear. (There is nothing
wrong with researching the subject, except when
it gets obsessive.) I've been paralyzed by fear
at times, real and imagined. What I do know is
normally the fear is far worse in my head than
what actually happens. There are many times I've
imagined the outcomes of different conversations
or scenarios, and they are always disastrous.
When I build up the courage to act through the
fear, I don't think it has ever been as bad as
I imagined.
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I reviewed an older popular book, "Feel
the Fear and Do It Anyway", by Susan Jeffers,
who asks, "IF YOU KNEW YOU COULD HANDLE ANYTHING
THAT CAME YOUR WAY, WHAT WOULD YOU POSSIBLY HAVE
TO FEAR? The answer is: NOTHING! ALL YOU HAVE
TO DO TO DIMINISH YOUR FEAR IS TO DEVELOP MORE
TRUST IN YOUR ABILITY TO HANDLE WHATEVER COMES
YOUR WAY!" She identifies 5 "FEAR TRUTHS:
- The fear will never go away as long as I continue
to grow.
- The only way to get rid of the fear of doing
something is to go out and do it.
- The only way to feel better about myself is
to go out and do it.
- Not only am I going to experience fear whenever
I'm on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone
else.
- Pushing through fear is less frightening than
living with the underlying fear that comes from
a feeling of helplessness."
Some leaps of faith I took were huge- like leaving
a marriage with an 8 month old and pregnant with
my second. I was clear on wanting to step through
the fear of being alone to better my life for
my family. Yet, for years I had a huge fear of
conflict and would do everything in my power to
ensure there would be peace, often agreeing with
things I didn't agree with inside. It got to a
point where I didn't really know what I wanted
anymore, I was so intent on being what I thought
I was supposed to be rather than who I was. And
each time I gave into my fear, I lost a little
piece of myself, gave a little piece of my power
away. What I do know is when I do step through
the fear and "just do it", I empower
myself, gain more confidence in my abilities and
my self-esteem and courage increases. Life just
gets better! To me, fear is simply stepping out
of my comfort zone, it's listening to my higher
self, the one that tells me I am worthy and deserving
of all the goodness I desire, and following my
heart. It's determining that I'm worth the risk,
that my life will be more fulfilling for doing
it, whether I succeed or fail. It's my inner critics
that usually hold me back- those gremlins telling
me I'm not good enough, I'm too old, I'm no good,
I'll fail etc. I need to remind myself I can come
from my fear place, my ego-driven state, where
I get struck with fear, insecurities, self-consciousness,
anxiety, or I can choose to come from my centred,
or healthy state- that place of connection, acceptance,
detachment, mindfulness. I can choose to stay
stuck in my fear and frozen, or I can acknowledge
it, accept it and move forward into the light.
So what is fear holding you back from experiencing?
A career change? Taking your business in a new
direction? Starting a business? Hiring someone?
Running? Rock climbing? Taking a vacation? Acting
in a play? Painting? Playing piano? Rollerblading?
According to RealAge.com, "there may be a
link between a fear of novel situations and a
shorter life span. If you've nothing to fear but
fear itself, take a leap of faith the next time
you are presented with an opportunity to experience
something new."
My challenge to you is to Feel the Fear and Do
it Anyway- you'll come out the other side a lot
more confident than when you started, and who
knows, you may live longer! What holds you back?
Back to Mark Stanton Welch's song- "I was
not meant to be a stranger Not meant to be down
I was born to soar the heavens Turn this world
around. When I was a little boy I looked life
in the face I just won't rest Till I stand in
that place, again."
Enjoy the journey back to the place where you
are standing in your power once again!
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This section is reserved for tips or successes
you would like to share. What worked well for
you? How did you do it? Or what's an awesome website
you've been to, or book you've read? A quote that's
inspired you to action, or changed your thinking
and your life? Or brought a smile to your face?
My friend Julie Jordan Scott's newsletter arrived
this week in my inbox, and I just now had the
opportunity to read it. Here is a wonderful exercise
Julie wrote to release those thoughts and beliefs
that hold us back. Thanks Julie!
- HOLD that thought. The usual way of responding
to a negative thought is by allowing unconscious
patterns to chase it away and hide it, allowing
it to stay "undercover" and unconsciously
keeps you locked up or by allowing it to chase
you, consistently nipping at your heels thus
actively becoming larger and larger and larger
than it ever was. Either way reinforces the
words of Pir Vilayat Inayat Khan who said, "The
bind is in the mind". When you "HOLD
the Thought" you literally place the thought
or the belief in your hand. Perhaps even in
front of you. Don't focus on the "wrong"
ness of the thought or belief, instead, look
at it with wonder. "Wrong" is covered
in darkness, "Wonder" is based in
light.
- THANK the Thought or Belief for being a messenger
along your path. Take it (the belief which you
are holding in your hand) and place it over
your heart where it can be embraced by the pulse
of the life force in your body. Its energy will
process the darkness along with the gratitude
expressed in your words and in your experience
and bring you into more light - more love -
more good. You may not at first know what to
thank that belief for bringing to you, so you
may be very general: "Thank you, Belief,
for reminding me of what is darkness and what
is light." "Thank you, Belief, for
your message." "Thank you, Belief,
for serving me in the past - I recognize you
for what you have been and now."
- RELEASE the Thought or Belief. Take your hand
away from your heart and lift your hand towards
the sky. The Divine is ready, willing and able
to accept any of our "old stuff" that
has been a burden to us. Simply finishing your
"I recognize you for what you have been
and now I release you" will bring you back
to center. The shift happens when you let go
- when you release the hold of whatever Thought
or Belief that has been binding your mind, your
thoughts and the patterns of your behavior.
You can repeat the process as frequently as
you desire. As your awareness increases, the
lighter, easier and more rapid this process
will become for you. Practice with different
words and with different physical techniques.
If you have a strong tendency towards intellectualizing,
you may want to incorporate an acknowledgement
of your intellect in this process, as perhaps
it is your intellect that has unconsciously
moved the energy in a negative direction and
then
Choose to move in the direction that serves your
good and the greatest good of all. Hold, Thank
and Release. Hold, Thank and Release. Hold, Thank
and Release.
Julie Jordan Scott is a Personal Success and
Creativity Coach. Dare to Discover Your Passion,
Decide to Live Your Destiny! Subscribe now to
the ezine that will show you how. Best of all,
its completely complimentary! Sign up at her website:
http://www.5passions.com
now.
visit
Julie's website »

I will be hosting a teleclass series on "Goals-
How to Set them and Get them". We will review
the importance of connecting your goals to your
values and vision, setting SMART goals, your compelling
reasons behind your goals, being clear on whose
goals they are, using positive power statements,
how to set yourself up for success, dealing with
negative self-talk and celebrating successes.
The teleclass will be learner-driven, so where
you want to venture is where we will go!
The workshop will run 4 Tuesday evenings, May
4, 11, 18 and 25, from 6:30 pm to 7:30 pm PST.
The cost is only $49 CAD per person for the 4
sessions, plus the cost of a long distance call
each week to the bridge line in the US.
I would love to have you on the call! If you
have a friend who may be interested, let them
know too! If you refer someone, you get in for
$20. For more information or to register, please
contact me by phone or email. Space is limited,
so sign up now!
»
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I am Norma Reid, a Certified Executive Coach,
and the owner of From Dreams to Reality Success
Coaching. My dream is to help you fulfill your
professional and personal dreams and live the
rich, full life you are meant to! Call for a sample
coaching session to see if coaching is for you.
Please forward this newsletter or the Quote of
the Day to anyone you think would enjoy them.
They are opt- in, so only those who subscribe
will receive them. If you aren't subscribed to
the quote of the day, you may want to- just click
on "update your profile" down below
and follow the instructions. I've had lots of
very positive comments from readers on them!
Thank you once again for letting me share part
of your journey with you. Until next time, enjoy
the incredible wonder and beauty this time of
year blesses us with! Make your life a little
more beautiful by starting something new- feel
the fear, and do it anyway!
More about Norma...
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Archived Newsletters...
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email:
voice: (250) 334-3418
web: http://www.fromdreamstoreality.ca
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From Dreams to Reality Success
Coaching: #18 - 1905 Willemar Ave, Courtenay, BC
V9N 3M5 - Canada
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